What's new?
Barn-ready gear for long-ear lovers.
Made to order, one at a time.
Every sale helps donkey rescues.
Just Unloaded
Hay Dealer Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee
$24.99
Hay Dealer Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee
$24.99
Hay Dealer Unisex Heavy Blend™ Hooded Sweatshirt
$34.99
Hay Dealer Unisex Heavy Blend™ Hooded Sweatshirt
$34.99
Bare Ass Ambiance Unscented Candle
$19.99
Bare Ass Ambiance Unscented Candle
$19.99
Sit My Ass On The Porch Candle
$19.99
Sit My Ass On The Porch Candle
$19.99
Escape To Ass Island Candle
$19.99
Escape To Ass Island Candle
$19.99
Curry-Comb That Ass Candle
$19.99
Curry-Comb That Ass Candle
$19.99
Freshly Washed Ass Candle
$19.99
Freshly Washed Ass Candle
$19.99
Hot Ass Cinnamon Roll Candle
$19.99
Hot Ass Cinnamon Roll Candle
$19.99
Born from childhood daydreams
and crafted into gear you wear through muddy-boot mornings,
Half-Ass Couture carries stubborn pride and long-ear devotion.
Barn Bins
Barn Bins
Barnyard Banter
Barnyard Banter
Custom Corral
Custom Corral
Farmhand Favorites
Farmhand Favorites
Gift Bundles
Gift Bundles
Holiday Hoedown
Holiday Hoedown
Just Unloaded
Just Unloaded
Limited Edition Drops
Limited Edition Drops
Steals & Deals
Steals & Deals
Under $25
Under $25
Last Chance
Last Chance
Frequently asked questions
What is the return policy?
You have 30 days from delivery to return unworn, non-custom items with tags for a refund or exchange. Custom or personalized products are only returnable if damaged or misprinted.
Read our full Returns & Refunds policy »
Are any purchases final sale?
Yes—items marked Final Sale or Clearance, as well as gift cards, cannot be returned or exchanged.
Learn more in our full Returns & Refunds policy »
When will I get my order?
Once you place your order, we send it to fulfillment 4 hours later. You can edit or cancel your order during that 4 hour window by logging into your customer account. Our fulfillment partner typically takes 1–3 business days to print and pack your items. After that, transit times are:
- US: 2–7 business days (remote areas may add 7–12 days)
- International: 7–30 business days
You’ll receive a tracking link by email once your order ships. You can also check order status inside your customer account.
See our full Shipping Policy »
Where are your products manufactured?
All of our items are made to order by our network of trusted partners. Depending on the product and your shipping address, your order may be produced in one of our U.S. facilities or by an international partner. This on-demand model lets us keep inventory low, cut waste, and ensure each piece is made just for you.
How much does shipping cost?
Shipping costs vary by product size, weight, and destination. You will always know the shipping price before you purchase.
Orders over $99 qualify for free standard US shipping. Expedited and international rates are calculated at checkout.
See our full Shipping Policy »